What is Adoption

Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Adoption results in the severing of the parental responsibilities an...

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Advice:
is it worth it?
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my adopted mother keeps trying to discourage me from trying to find my birth siblings ( i know both BP but can't stand them) because some are so much older than me,like 7-8 years older and her reasoning is they may know about me but not care or not want to find me. but i feel like its something i have to do in order to find myself. so to anyone who has actually found either BP or BS was the whole process worth it?
Posted on 10/09/09, 07:10 pm
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Reply #1 - 10/10/09  10:36am
" hi there
i have found both bm and bf. so did my sister(she was adopted too and we grew up together). although our stories are very very different, the end result is that we dont have a lot of communication with our bm's or bf's. maybe i should clarify. my sister and i are not blood. i was adopted out of toronto at 4 wks and my sister out of kitchener at like 5 months. so we dont have the same birth parents.
all i am looking for now is to have a relationship with my brothers. i have 3 and since my bm and bf got married 3 years after i was born these brothers are 100% blood. not sure that this is going to happen, but thats really all i would care about.
if you ask me...."would i do it all over again?" i would honestly answer "NO". i wouldnt. its caused me some great emotional pain, and has hindered me more then helped. but what is done is done so now i hope to kindle something with my brothers.
good luck dear
i hope the best for you "
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Reply #2 - 10/13/09  7:01am
" It's just really hard
in my case they dont want to know me as I do them
except one brother (well he seems to)
i am feeling very hurt at the moment all three sisters dont seem to want to have anything to do with me and i have tried so hard
it just hurts and i dont know whether it was worth all the pain and rejection i now am feeling
u could be lucky and they may welcome you with open arms
you need too decide what you can deal with good or bad "
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Reply #3 - 10/13/09  1:48pm
" Yes, it is worth it. Good or bad it is worth it. I was "found" by my 1/2 sister and we are close. Through her I got to know and meet my bmom. Through my bmom I found my bdad, met him once and he has 3 daughter who do not want to know me...their loss. I think maybe your amom just wants to protect you from hurt. If you go into it with a open mind and not high expectations it may go better. I wish you much love in your journey. "
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Reply #4 - 10/14/09  1:18am
" My birth mother has stopped me being in contact with any of my biological relatives. I desperately want to know who they are and get to know them. She gave me an ultimatum, it was either her or them, I chose them. I am still looking for them, the constant yearning to know who they are will never go away till I find them. I say do what you need to do, I know she is only trying to protect you but you will never know unless you find out. Good luck :) "

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