Abstinence & Celibacy Support Group

I don't see a problem with identifying with others who are trying to keep abstinent, after all that is what groups are for, supporting one another. It is good to line up with others who have similar goals, you can encourage one another and strengthen one another.

but with it being a public group, its considered official. theyre showing others what the standard is for abstinence and celibacy. what if theyre extremist... no kissing, no lust, no touching, no affection... what if they only abstain for religious reasons... and make abstinence into another christian cult. i dont like the idea that when i say im abstinent, ill be compared to their standard of what theyre like.

There are already rules in schools for no public displays of affection. They already don't allow kissing, or other affectionate displays in public schools.

I don't understand why them abstaining for religious reasons would be a problem?

A Christian Cult? I'm not sure I understand how Christians who choose to follow Jesus would be a cult? There is only one place sex is allowed for Christians, and that is in the marriage between the husband and wife. It is more than physical action though. Truthfully the word for fornication is the Greek word Pornea which is where we get our word for pornography. Jesus said in Matthew 5:28:

"But I say to you, that whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart."

There is a heart problem that is at the root of mankind, a sin nature that must be confronted within each of us. The bible declares in Jeremiah 17:9 "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked".

Let's face it, the chances of someone who does not kiss, does not lust and does not touch being successful at staying celibate are greater than someone who does do those things. If someone wants to stay celibate they need to avoid physical contact that would tempt them into breaking their vow of celibacy, and not only physical contact but any lustful thing, in truth we should vow also to keep our minds celibate, to further draw near to Jesus.

Consider what the Proverb says in chapter 6:

" 23 For the commandment is a lamp,
And the law a light;
Reproofs of instruction are the way of life,
24 To keep you from the evil woman,
From the flattering tongue of a seductress.
25 Do not lust after her beauty in your heart,
Nor let her allure you with her eyelids.
26 For by means of a harlot
A man is reduced to a crust of bread;
And an adulteress will prey upon his precious life.
27 Can a man take fire to his bosom,
And his clothes not be burned?
28 Can one walk on hot coals,
And his feet not be seared?"

No instead a celibate person should focus on other things and have clear boundaries drawn. Just as an alcoholic who has vowed to never drink again, who then becomes a Christian, and wants to minister to those in a similar situation as he was in, should not go back to the bars to minister, since this would be a place of temptation for that person who once was bound alcohol.

Why did you add me as a friend if you think I'm part of a cult? I don't want to kiss ANYONE before my wedding day (although that may change) and it IS related to religious reasons. It is something I desired for a longtime and I still like the idea of it, but it just seems like it would be more special if its reserved for that one person. Stopping lust is the main reason for me to refrain from these activites although I don't think anyone fully conqueres their desires enough to avoid taking a second glance at a cute guy or girl.

Choices.

I wonder. Abstinence should be a decision you make, but for the most part so should most other things. It should be decisions you yourself make, except that people are very easily influenced by what they see...and before you know it, the decision is made for them. "Oh, they're all doing it, I can too." And for some odd reason, most people don't have their own thinking abilities, nor do they have a strong enough conscience or even common sense for that matter. So I question as to how many people consciously make their choices, as opposed to those that let the majority make their choices for them.

Information about anything is so easy to obtain nowadays, but it's just too much effort to gather it yourself and make a personal choice - one that coincides with what you believe, one that you yourself agree with, one that makes you live the life that makes you happy on more than just the shallow levels, which on many occasions is the "social status" level. What other's think of you. It makes people so happy to be able to give up on their personal choices to be part of their social group. No two persons are the same, but so many people have "joined in" to their choices and haven't actually made them themselves. They made the choice to take the most available route and assume that they're choice is the right one.

Here comes the PC part - Nothing is black and white, and there may not be a "right" choice, but people should take more time to examine themselves personally, instead of getting their choices lost to cliches, groups, friends, families, role models, religions, their favourite TV shows/music groups/fictional characters/etc. I'm sure people have the ability to think about their choices from all perspectives and I'm sure they don't have to be influenced by other's in making their decisions. I know I have that ability, and I was born on this planet along with the rest of you.

Woops went a little off. About the topic, I don't see much wrong with having abstinence groups, it would make me feel better to assume that people joining those groups made it their decision to be abstinent, and didn't make the group the reason to be abstinent. I'm abstinent for several strong reasons, a couple of them are very strong, but I found these reasons on my own and I took my own time to think things through and come to what is logical to me, to what makes complete sense to me and what is in line with my own personal morals. There are no more "whys" to ask myself, I have answered them all and my answers don't revolve around: "because [Insert Name Here] says so".