ADHD / ADD Support Group

Id say, just try to get him involved with the conversation; ask his opinion. Its very hard to get focused; yet when i do get focused i can generally keep it focused. My parents nag me alot, so i've eventually just been able to completely ignore them and not even hear them; so dont just talk at him. Ask questions!!! Hope this helps.

Logan

When you get a chance, look up the symptoms of both ADD and ADHD. I am of the combined type so I am certain that my habits can be hard to deal with. However, I have always been endeared in my relationships and I am in a wonderful marriage and we had been together since like our senior year in college (and we did not go to the same school).

At any , once you get a chance to appreciate the symptoms, you will understand that somethings that drive you crazy that are a part of his personality are because of his ADD and other things are just because of him as a person. Men and women have expectations sometimes in relationships and as a WOMAN, whether you have ADD, ADHD, or not, some of the things that bother you are things that all women would comment on. TRUST ME...he will open up in time.

Don't bring up the ADD as if it is a problem because it is not (meaning that you obviously love him as he is your fiance, but love all of him, love will bring you through); it is just the way his brain functions, but take advantage because you will find that the just sitting there, not talking back,etc., will come in time. It will (my husband has ADD as well).

The best advice that I can give is live one day at a time and appreciate your relationship. Take one day at a time and you all will grow. The more you understand about the symptoms and just in getting to know and love your man more, the better your relationship will be in the long run for it.

Hang in there, this is not the end of the world...it only gets better, trust me!

Thanks so much for the advice! It's just hard because i don't understand...and am trying my best to learn more! =D

hello. I suggest you try to discern what behaviors the illness may be causing and which ones your boyfriend can control. I have ADHD and was in a long term relationship until recently. After a while I just found it easier to be alone than to have to explain myself to someone all the time - my ex didn't take the time to understand adhd and just kept judging me by his own standards. I hope that will not happen in your relationship because I really loved my ex, I just couldn't handle managing both ADHD and an intense relationship. Don't get too frustrated with your partner, he probably really loves you a lot and that is all that matters.

Here is a link that I hope will help: http://www.addresources.org/articl...

Hi!
I'm a former teacher who worked extensively with ADHD kids, most of whom are now ADHD adults. The thing you need to keep in mind is that the behaviors your fiance is exhibiting are due to the way he processes information, so don't take them personally. For example, if he isn't being communicative, it could be b/c he's just feeling overwhelmed, so give him some space. Try to keep conversations short and to the point so that he doesn't drift off or lose focus. Talk about the most important things first, before his attention starts to wander. Understand that people with ADD/ADHD often act impulsively, so don't be hurt or offended if he reacts without thinking. Also, many people with ADD/ADHD have trouble "reading" people, so your fiance may not always pick up on how you're feeling. Remember that none of this is your fault or his. It's just part of the condition.
I'd recommend you read up on ADD so you have an idea of what you're dealing with and how best to help. I've written a novel about a high school teacher working with an ADHD student. It might be helpful for you. If you're interested, you can check out my website at www.jackieminniti.com. There are also links to some good ADD sites that might help.
Good luck, and if there's any way I can help, please let me know.